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Young and Sober

YOU ARE NOT ALONE


Yesterday I got an email via a social networking site from a young girl who read my book.  I get emails like this daily, it is the reason I wrote the book, to reach young people and let them know they aren’t alone.  This email was a little different.  The young girl said she was cutting herself and using drugs and she could relate to my story. I emailed her back, told her she wasn’t alone and tried to talk with her about resources she could access.  I noticed from her profile that she was a local girl—that she sat…

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Mother’s Day


Traditionally my birthday and mother’s day have always fallen on the same weekend or at the least one weekend apart. When I was little some of my sweetest mother/daughter moments were of these times. My only truly fond memories of my mom and I are when I was very young, around age 5 or 6 when we would get all dressed up and go to this mother/daughter dinner thing with our church. I would drink Shirley Temple’s and in those moments felt connected to my mother. But the feeling didn’t last and our attendance at the dinner’s ended.

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To All Our Members


Dear  Friends,

Our Executive Director and founder of  The Second Road just received news last night that her father has metastatic cancer.  Melissa lost her sister last winter to breast cancer and, has since that time, legally adopted her sister’s 5 children, thereby making a major change in her life.

As I write this she is driving back home to be with her dad and her mom.

I ask special prayers, thoughts, and lots of light and serenity for Melissa as she faces yet another example of life on life’s terms.

Thank-you,

Till Next Time-

Your Humble Road Warrior

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Dressed to Kill


by William C. Moyers

Bill Blass knew a thing or two about clothes. So the legendary fashion designer had an easy answer to an age-old problem: “When in doubt, wear red.”

Now there’s evidence that what some kids are wearing these days could be red flags for parents and teachers.

Dear Mr. Moyers: For Christmas, my brother gave his niece, my daughter, a T-shirt with a big, bright Budweiser logo on the front. She loves it and wouldn’t take it off until the other day, when the school principal sent her home with a note informing us that she no longer will be…

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Effective treatment for heroin addiction is ignored.


Heroin has a very high potential for addiction, rarely are people able to experiment with the drug without developing a dependency. The painful withdrawal process from heroin keeps users in a desperate, destructive cycle.

A naturally occurring psychoactive compound has been scientifically identified as possessing anti-addictive properties. Ibogaine is used in Africa by the Bwiti tribe, for ritual and medicinal purposes. Research has proven that Ibogaine creates an immediate reduction in craving, even eliminating the potent withdrawal symptoms of heroin.

Have you ever heard of Ibogaine? Chances are that you haven’t.

Due to its controversial nature it is not used to treat opiate…

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Advice for the new Drug Czar


Here’s an abridged list of suggestions from Mark Kleiman. (Please take the time to read the whole thing here.)

1. Talk to Americans as if we are thinking adults.

2. You’ll be told that we have a national strategy resting on three legs: enforcement, prevention, and treatment. Don’t believe it. There is no coherent strategy.

3. “Drug czar” is a silly title. We’re not fighting a war, you don’t have czar-like powers, and the last actual czar who fought an actual war got clobbered. You’re stuck with the title. But don’t get sucked in to the rhetoric of “‘enemies”‘ and “‘victory.”‘ The drug…

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Let Go and Let God


The third step of Alcoholics Anonymous is as follows: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. This can be a really tricky one for many new comers into the program of recovery as it requires us to do two things that are very difficult. Give up control over our lives and hand our will over and to believe in this whole God thing enough to trust this new found higher power with our will. I have a tendency to hang onto things like playful puppy would a…

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Jenn’s Story Part 2


To read Part 1, click here.

After my first experience with alcohol, I remember regretting many of my actions that day.  I was embarrassed I couldn’t handle myself like some of my friends.  During this time, I was also dealing with depression on and off (more on than off).  This brings me to my second drinking experience. 

I was sitting in my room with all my family in the house and remember feeling uneasy and panicky (is that even a word).  I decided I would go and sneak 2 beer from the fridge outside and take a bath.  The first beer tasted…

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J-Online: My Story Part One - The Beginning


I am very excited to have the opportunity to share my journey with you all at The Second Road.  I never imagined my life would be like it is today, but I have come to realize everything happens for a reason.

I am a 33 year old recovering alcoholic.   The other day, I was trying to think of the very first time I ever drank and a memory played in my mind like a movie; every moment of every scene came back to me.  I had stuffed this deep inside my mind for so many years, but it finally hit me…

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I am one of the lucky ones, I see that now.


lucky power 

Over the weekend I attended an al anon meeting that was a bit out of my way, but I really wanted to try a new meeting and I am glad I did. I was able to see that I am one of the lucky ones. As sick as that sounds to me to verbalize, I know I am.

Before I go further let me give you a bit of background that I do not talk about much; While my husband was in the throes of his alcoholism aside from squandering all of his paycheck every week we went through a period…

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Hip to be square


I recently returned from a week long trip to Las Vegas.  Let me first state that in my humble opinion, a week is about four-five days too long to spend in Las Vegas for me.  Don’t get me wrong there is much to love about Vegas, the lights, the shopping, the energy etc.  However, after about the third day the lights became blinding, my wallet emptied and my energy was very low. I was there for a training and book signing; both which were amazing and totally worth the trip.  Being from the east coast, it took me a couple…

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Making Sacrifices….


 

I was really angry at sobriety over the weekend. And while I was pissed at sobriety, I was even more upset with the disease of alcoholism.

 

In the wake of a breakup earlier in the fall, I have done my best to dive deeper into the program and understand how I could have stayed as long as I did in a romantic relationship that was essentially extremely self destructive. And I wondered how I could have denied so many of the warning signs I saw with this ex significant other.

 And after writing pages of inventory on the relationship, I…

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It’s an Honest Program


One of the fundamental tools I learned early on in recovery was HONESTY. It is key to any healing, growth and recovery. As an active addict—I lied. I told white lies that I thought were harmless and I told major lies that I knew were destructive. I lied about little things and I lied about big things. I strung together a laundry line of lies that got so tangled by the end of it that I couldn’t tell fact from my created fiction. The lies were a part of keeping my addiction alive and kicking. The lies were built from…

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For Medicinal Purposes…


I apologize for being out of the loop lately. I recently had surgery and have been down for a while. This brings me to my recent blog about medication in recovery. Such a fun and always heated topic in meetings. I recently went to my first meeting yesterday after being laid up for a while with my surgery. I brought up the topic and sure enough sparks flew! There is such an interesting and overwhelmingly diverse opinion in recovery about this topic. It is one of the reasons I love recovery—it is one of the places where vast opinions can…

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Amends story…..


Well, it has been a long time since I entered a blog. This month has been a little busy, with some unexpected happenings. But I guess that is life!

Amends story ……………

So, I missed my friend’s burial, arrived at the meal after the funeral to have his father tell me repeatedly how important Junior and my friendship had been to him. To say that I felt like the biggest jerk in the world would have been an understatement.

Going to see Junior in the cemetery for amends was one of the first things to pop on my eighth step list a few…

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Why aren’t you skinny?


I was on the treadmill this morning running my morning mile when my parents woke up and came downstairs to join me. I felt good, having run a good mile in a decent time and decided to join them outside. They were in town for a night on their way home from Baltimore. I was doing my little dumbbell routine that I do every morning on the deck while they were sitting and pulling on their morning cigarette.

My father looks at me and said, “Ya know Jennifer, I don’t understand, you work out everyday and you don’t eat a…

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War on Drugs needs an approach like this….


I last wrote about the Montana Meth Project. While surfing the internet tonight I came across a great blog entry about it. Seems like Montana is actually Big Meth Country….

The blog tells the story of how a rich man made a wise investment! I think the government should direct it’s War on Drugs (Caesar would be embarrassed) money into pro-active campaigns like this one, but bless the independent investor who took it on instead!

A snapshot of article below, but visit methman for the full picture.

“The day that meth walked into our house was the day our life took a spiral,” she…

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Piece discovered at a yard sale


On this path to recovery, I’ve found myself a much more deliberate person. A good amount of people who’ve known me throughout the era’s have appreciated the change. I appreciate my own new found introspection as well, because my relationships are going a lot more smoothly. Not to mention how rewarding it is to sincerely care about other people, myself, and the fate of our world.

Not too long ago the Dalai Lama offered four days of teachings in Madison, WI. It felt like a blessing that my travels through Madison coincided with his visit-so I went. Of course I went.…

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FRUSTRATION


So I got rear ended this week. By a girl who said her breaks weren’t working right and this wasn’t the first time that happened. A couple months ago, a fellow drove into the side of my car at a busy intersection after explaining that he was trying to avoid a city utility truck parked on the sidewalk. At the beginning of the summer, my ex boss, who had me working ridiculously long hours for miniscule pay wrote me a letter explaining that I owed him a lot of money after I left the his business. I took the actions…

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Changing people, places, and things….


By Courtney H.

I have had this big fat resentment against a childhood friend of mine for not asking me to be in her wedding party this fall. Even though my decision to stop drinking seemed to signify a serious barrier to our friendship, I still thought our many childhood and teenage promises of having each other in our respective wedding parties would be met.

The barrier between us began during our college years. It seemed par for the course with living so far away from each other. When we worked in the same city the year I finished my graduate degree,…

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TURNING THE TABLES


by William C. Moyers

Sometimes the best advice comes when readers seek insight not in questions about themselves or their problems, but in querying me about my own experiences. This hit home in a recent letter from a 14-year-old boy.

Dear Mr. Moyers: I want to know what it was like to fall in the peer pressure of drugs and why you did. I know people always say to stay away from drugs, and I know to say no, but I want to know what it felt like to be asked. Were you nervous, anxious and scared? Being drug-free is very important…

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Acting as if…


by Courtney H.

I applied for two professional positions this week. One would involve working in public relations for the University of Virginia. The other is training potential journalists for seven months in Freetown, Sierra Leone. I think I could live with securing either or neither of those jobs. Truth be told, the idea of living in Africa scares me. But I have always longed for that experience. That desire has grown over the past five years as I have watched several of my friends and younger sister travel to the continent to work in professional capacities while helping various citizens…

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SOME BAD NEWS


Angela, who has worked on this site, sent this to me this week-end. Lest we ever forget….

from The Richmond Times Dispatch

“A woman was killed and a man was hurt yesterday in a single-car crash on state Route 288 in Chesterfield County.

Virginia State Police trooper M.S. Meyer said Megan R. Ford, 30, of the 6100 block of Watchhaven Circle in Chesterfield County was flown by helicopter to VCU Medical Center, where she died shortly after the 12:40 a.m. crash.

Ford’s passenger and husband, Jon G. Brown, 29, was taken by ambulance to VCU, where he was being treated for injuries that were…

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IT HAPPENS TO ME EVERY YEAR


by Greg W.

July 15th

It happens to me every year. I am not much of a morning person but there is that one morning that I wake up and immediately smile. Today was that day and I couldn’t place it. Was it watching Josh Hamilton (an inspiring recovering addict) hit 28 homers in a single round of the home-run derby at Yankee Stadium the night before? Was it the summertime? Then it hit me…it was July 15th, the day that has surpassed all other important days in my life. It is the day that everything changed. I finally woke up on…

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Montana Meth Project


I was a little paranoid the first time I saw one of these ads.
Not even ONce
It was twilight and I was scootin’ along a deserted road. I hadn’t seen anyone in hours. Suddenly I wondered, “are there fanatical meth heads running amuck?”

I’m an East Coaster.

I’ve run in circles where I see that meth is a huge problem and that it’s even a choice drug by the upper eschelon circles. I KNOW this, for a fact.

On the East Coast, we don’t have these drug campaigns; these brutal, honest, and sometimes grotesque images that seem to shout, “stop. stop now. you’re being tragic.”

Perhaps out…

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Who’s will is it anyway?


As of late my life is a stream of flowing change…ever moving and always shifting. The plan I had—ha—just saying that is funny, isn’t it. But, anyway, the plan I had of course isn’t unfolding in my life. In the rooms there is a saying—if you want to hear your higher power laugh—tell your plan for your life. It is so true. I still don’t know what is best for me all the time and just when I think I have it all figured out…WHAM! It all changes.

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Trying something different…….


As of this week, I have a membership to a gym again. It has been nearly three years since I have allowed myself such an expense. My Higher Power has definitely made joining a gym possible for me financially, which is another big reason I had for staying away from gyms. The gym management put me on my boyfriend’s membership, so I am receiving a discount through him. I met with a trainer and negotiated a much smaller fee then what they originally wanted to charge me for a few sessions.

I am still not a fan of working out in…

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Moving along…


Yesterday was my second anniversary of living a clean and sober existence! Two years ago yesterday, I woke up in a jail cell pretty unaware of what had happened after being arrested on a DUI. A steady bout of hard daily drinking that had been mostly secretive in nature mostly preceded the arrest. I was unemployed, depressed, and terrified.

I spent that morning seriously debating killing myself between bouts of throwing up everything I had been drinking. My day was topped off by over six hours in court and attending an AA meeting. I had been to AA meetings in the…

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Take the cotton out of your ears…


…and stick it in your mouth. I remember hearing this old timers slogan often when I first came into the rooms of recovery over 10 years ago. I have to admit I found it quite offensive at the time but that was of course because I thought I knew everything. I would share incessantly at meetings about everything in my life whether it pertained to recovery or not, sometimes taking up 10 or more minutes of a 60 minute meeting. Talk about self-serving. But I was green and didn’t know the ropes until an old timer approached me after a…

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WHAT TO SAY…


by Courtney H.

I never know what to say when the subject of drinking comes up. It is probably a pretty sure sign of my alcoholism that I have spent a fair amount of time considering this as some sort of quandary . When I am around someone who doesn’t know I am in the program and they want to know my favorite drink of the moment or when I am going to hit up happy hour with them, my immediate reaction is to clam up, red faced. Then I usually mutter, “I don’t drink,” and try escape the conversation quickly.…

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